YOU LEAVE ME SPEECHLESS
by Devilslawyer123
Summary: Bella's heart is broken, and wound healer is Jason Blackfire. he turns her into one of THEM. but who is thm? are they real vampires? or something more terrifying? and what happens when she sees edward . . . again? R AND R!
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER 1.**

_Edwards's voice carried me through the forest. He was leaving. Abandoning me. He said 'no, I don't love you'. He had promised me a thousand things and now he had broken everyone of them. I gasped as the pain of my breaking heart caught up with me; my feet dragging me on, into the unknown._

"_Bella! Wait! Come back! Please!" he was begging now, I could hear him running behind me, too weak to overtake and stop me. Tears started to flow down my face; I choked on my own sorrow. He had loved me, he had told me, and now he was taking everything back, breaking my heart . . . _

_My usually clumsy feet didn't let me fall this time. They took me onwards until I broke through the trees into the clearing. Edward gasped._

"_Bella, don't be like this, PLEASE! This is as painful to me as it is for you." No that was wrong. Those were the words I _wanted _him to say. Instead he stood in front of me, his eyes cold and menacing, and his face expressionless, he muttered, "Bella, I don't want you. You are not good for me." And then he was gone._

_I lay in the grass, staring up at the sky with unseeing eyes._

_And then I screamed._

I screamed louder until my throat hurt. I was blind, my hands groped for something or someone; my body writhed in agony and I screamed . . .

And screamed . . .

And screamed . . .

Somebody touched my forehead and whispered, "It's OK now, baby. Everything is going to be _fine._" Somebody laughed, and as the pain grew, the sense of numbness took over. As I blacked out, the last thing I saw was a pair of green eyes staring down at me.

His voice called my name, his hands touched my unconscious body, his face smiled down at me, and his mouth formed shapes that turned into words. I stared, trying to understand what this vision was telling me, trying to make out dream from reality. I screamed again, my whole body writhing and burning. Somebody touched me and I calmed. I breathed through my nose and smelled blood, my stomach churned. I gasped as the pain sliced through my vision and I was alone in my mind.

_Edward_. My mind screamed, _Edward, come back! Edward I need you!_ His face became more and more remote. My mind started to forget the crooked smile and the dazzling eyes. My mind forgot what his velvet voice did to me when he spoke. All I could remember was the pain . . .

"Is she awake?" a male voice asked. It was silky smooth and promising.

"She is regaining consciousness but she is not fully awake yet." Another male voice answered. This voice seemed to be closer to me.

"What does she keep muttering?" the first voice asked, annoyed. The second voice was silent for a minute and then whispered, "_Edward. Edward come back! I need you!_" the first voice laughed. The second growled and it was silent again. I opened my eyes and gasped. The boy in front of me was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. His hands worked over me with a concentrated ease that awed me. His handsome face was turned away from me, looking at some bruises on my legs which I now saw were quickly fading. His mouth turned into a smile as he saw me.

"Ah, you are awake at last." I recognized this voice as the voice that had repeated those dreaded words.

"W-where am I?" I croaked. He was strikingly beautiful. His jet black hair curled at the nape of his neck, a few spikes of fringe getting in the way of his striking eyes which were the colour of the sea and a field in spring. The only thing that gave him away was the paleness of his skin.

"You're at your new home." He said. His voice was silky smooth and so sure that that was the thing I wanted to hear. It was.

"Tell her that, and she'll run a mile." A second bored voice interjected. Black haired boy rolled his eyes and smile reassuringly at me.

"Are you a vampire?" I whispered. The boy sighed and sat back on his heels.

"Yes and no." the second voice laughed, and the owner came into view mimicking perfectly the black haired boy's voice, "Yes and no, yes and no. it's either yes or no Jason."

"It's either you shut up or I make you, Ryan." The boy called Jason growled. I flinched at the malice in his voice, but he turned a sunny smile on me and everything else seemed not to matter.

"Yes we are vampires but . . . we are _different _from the vampires _you _used to know." I closed my eyes at the mentioning of the Cullen's, even if they hadn't said their name, I knew who he meant, and the painful memories rushed back. Ryan looked at me and sighed.

"She isn't going to be an easy sport, Jez. She doesn't seem to abandon her past, to put everything behind her,"

"Yes I do. I want to forget everything and everyone of my past."

Jason smiled and said, "You are one of us, now. A vampire."

"When you said you weren't like . . . _those _vampires, what did you mean?"

"I meant, we were not made like this by another vampire, we were born like this. That's why our eye colour is different from theirs. But we don't feed off humans, just animals." He grinned and I sighed. He _was_ the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. Maybe he could help me forget about Edward and his lies. . .

"What about Charlie?" Ryan laughed and sat in a wide leather armchair in front of the spitting fire.

"From now on, _we _are your family." I smiled and settled down into the sofa, drifting off into an unnatural sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2.**

**2 YEARS LATER.**

"Bella? Where's my black shirt?" Jason yelled. His voice was annoyed but amused at the same time, I knew he wouldn't be angry with me. He couldn't afford it as Ryan once said.

"It's in your room, where it SHOULD be!" I yelled back, laughing. Ryan was running up and down the stairs, packing his school bag and moaning about how boring school was and why did we have to go? What was the point? We already knew everything there was to know! I agreed but Kayla had said that the police would be on our backs if they heard of five teenagers out of school.

I was finally a vampire, and my life was turning for the better. Jason was the bestest boyfriend and best friend I could ever ask for, Ryan was a hottie but a bit of a jerk at the same time, but he had a heart (?) of gold. Kayla was a bitch in some ways but an angel in other ways – especially when she wanted something. You could only love and worship Craig! He was cute, handsome, funny, intelligent, and cool. You were always looking for fun when you were around him. Kayla and I were the only girls in our group. Nobody questioned out lack of grown ups. Our _guardians _as Jason put it were Greg and Lilly, but you could hardly call them _guardians. _More like older siblings.

"Bella! Stop lounging in front of the mirror and get down here! We're gonna be late!" Ryan yelled. He was always nervous on the day we start school, for whatever reason I would never know. I ran down the stairs, bag slung over one shoulder, one arm full of books and the other trying to fit a hair pin without giving myself severe damage. Jason laughed when he saw me and rushed to my side, relieving me of my heavy load. I smiled and got the pin in.

"Come ON! Urgh, love bugs! I hate 'em." Ryan stamped his foot and got into his shiny Porsche. I walked over to my Camarro with Jason in tow, letting him drive, since I was still trying to sort myself out.

New school, New Year, new life.

Jason parked the car with silky fashion and leaned over to kiss me on the lips.

"Meet me at lunch _right here_, OK?" I nodded gobsmacked and he laughed, tracing his cold finger over my lips and smiling showing all of his white teeth in a way that took my breath away. I kissed him back and got out of the car, heading for the main entrance, my arm linked through Kayla's on one side and Craig on the other. We three were seventeen years old, while Jason and Ryan were eighteen. The last time I'd been with someone older than me, he was a hundred and twenty years old.

"Students! Students! Please head to the main hall for the starting assembly." The head teacher yelled through a megaphone. We walked lightly to the main hall, bathing in the stares coming from all the other students who were pointing and whispering.

Craig lifted one eyebrow at one girl who blushed and started whispering to her friend. I elbowed him and he laughed when I rubbed my sore spot.

"You shouldn't encourage them, Craig!" I mock yelled. He laughed again and Kayla joined in. as we rounded a corner, I came face to face with the last person I'd ever wanted to see. His gold eyes stared at me in shock, his mouth forming a perfect 'o' of shock. His arms were full of his and his sister's books as she sorted herself out.

Edward Cullen. I gasped and reeled back, knocking into Jason who heard my thoughts of shock and came instantly my way. Ryan growled and pulled me away, while Edward kept looking at me, his eyes full of . . . what? What did he still feel for me that was now locked into those deep eyes of his? I glowered at him and turned away, hurrying to the other side of the hall, where Craig was standing. Jason rushed after me and spun me round, his striking eyes full of unanswered questions.

He opened his mouth and I lay a finger on his lips, silencing him. He leaned in for the kiss, and with some satisfaction I felt the silent scream in Edward's thoughts.

_Edward sat on his king sized bed, doubled up and howling in pain. Why? Why? Why would she do this to him? Why would she want him to suffer? To _see _him suffer? He had wanted her to be happy, of course. But this way? Haunting him? Making him feel guilty? Make him regret the decision he never wanted to make? He wrapped his arms around his waist, trying to keep the pain from ripping him apart._

_Alice had come in earlier, showing him hat it would've been for Bella if Jason hadn't stepped into her life. What the Cullen's life would've been if Bella had died by jumping off that cliff? Venom flooded his mouth hungrily, and he saw Bella once again. The evening he had told her all those lies. That he didn't love her, when really; here he was, locked up in his room, trying to keep from dying. The pain was unbearable. He howled again . . ._

_And again . . ._

_And again . . ._

I stood up and left the building in a hurry. I wanted to see Jason, feel his arms around me telling me that everything was Ok now that he was there. Why was Edward such a monster? Staring at me like I was his long lost girlfriend? I _might've _been. If he had stuck around long enough to help me. But he didn't and what's done is done.

I walked through the crowded hallways, sensing students staring at me and whispering about me. Kayla squealed and rushed by my side, linking arms and launching into a detailed account of whom, what, when, and how this guy she sat next to in her calculus class asked her to the dance.

"So I said _I'm ever so sorry, but I'm taken._ And I show point over at Craig who is everything BUT oblivious to what we were talking about . . ." did I mention that Kayla LOVES gossip? She can go on for hours on end bitching about someone. Jason was waiting by his car as promised and Kayla took the hint by leaving, and catching up with Craig.

All of us knew that Craig worshipped Kayla, but he wasn't about to give in and date her. Kayla would love that.

"Hey, baby." Jason wrapped his strong arms and planted a kiss on my lips. When we broke apart, I noticed a few girls shrug their shoulders and leave. Jason saw this too and laughed out loud. His green eyes looked down at me softly and he traced his finger across my lips. I head his thoughts plain and clear like he was saying them out loud, _why did you freak out today? Who was that guy?_

_Edward Cullen, _I told him. His eyes widened and he scanned the parking lot, hoping to see him and get a chance to break his bones.

_He's back? Wow, he's got a nerve by even LOOKING at you._

_It's OK, don't worry about it. I won't freak out again, OK? And, _I kissed him again; _you know you are the only one for me._

_Bella, you are gong to kill me one day. _I laughed. The bell rang and I ran to where Kayla was standing, like somebody had just slapped her.

"Hey, are you ok?" I linked arms with her and dragged her off to Spanish.

"Sure. Why wouldn't I be?" I scanned her thoughts and found a very interesting one. Kayla glared at me and slapped me playfully around the arm.

"Urgh, I hope we don't have a _seating plan _like in Biology! God, that was soooo retarded." I nodded in agreement and we entered the nearly full class. Javier (Pronounced _ha-ve-er_) as he wanted us to call him, made us sit at the back of the class, next to the door. Sitting down, I took out my books and sighed. Trying to ignore your need for blood when you were in a class full of delicious humans was a very bad prospect. Venom pooled my mouth and I swallowed hard; the chair next to mine was pulled out and somebody sat there. I ignored them and continued doodling in my notebook. Kayla nudged me sharply and I glanced up at her. Her thoughts yelled at me, _uh-oh. Look beside you._ I inclined my head gently and slightly to the side, and gasped. My eyes narrowed and I moved as far way as the table allowed from _that _person.

Edward stared unhappily towards the front where I saw Alice and Jasper. His eyes moved over to me and stopped. I was trapped once again by _those _eyes. The eyes whose owner broke my heart into a thousand million pieces like he was _enjoying _it I glared at him. His eyes never moved from my neck, where my half-moon scar was.

_Don't tell Jason! He'll kill Edward! You know he will! _I shrugged and looked back down at my notebook. Jason _would _find out, and there was nothing I could do to stop him. He wouldn't do anything stupid, I knew, but he would warn Edward.

At least, I _hope _he wouldn't do anything stupid. Javier wrote a passage in Spanish which we had to copy, and that took my mind off the person next to me. Memories of that evening, of him abandoning me wouldn't go away. Try hard as I might, he had left a wound in my heart, a wound that Jason had started to heal.

"OK, class! For homework," the class groaned and he laughed, "For homework, the only thing I want you to do is write a passage about yourself in Spanish of course." He flashed a brilliant smile my way. Kayla nudged me sharply and her thoughts hissed, _don't you dare!_

_What's your problem? _I hissed back.

_My problem is YOU! You are taken whilst I am not! You have Jason Blackfire for pity's sake! _I rolled my eyes. This happened _every time _she laid eyes on someone she liked but they noticed ME first!

_Don't you worry about that! And anyway, Jason is more than enough for me._ She made a retching motion by holding her stomach and leaning over the side. When she 'recovered' she flashed a sexy cat smile at Javier and swept out, leaving the scent of roses behind her.

I sat with my head in my arms. Mind communication was SO not my strong point; it had always left me exhausted and hungry. I knew what my friends would have for lunch; Jason would have a hamburger, Ryan would have Oven Baked Pasta, Kayla would serve herself to a Ceaser Salad, and Craig would have a bit of everything. Me? I would hardly touch the food they put in front of me. In fact, if it wasn't for Jason who forced some food down my throat everyday, I would hardly eat.

What's the point? I had once asked him. He had sighed and laid his head in my lap, and with his fingers he traced patterns on my face.

"Bella, we are partially human, OK? If we don't eat or drink, like humans we would suffer the consequences. In our case, no food or drink will make us live on blood alone, which would make us greedy for more and more, until we become blood thirsty monsters. When we become like that, nobody can stop us attack _anything._" He had closed his eyes when he finished, which made _another _question spill from my mouth. Did I mention I was curious? Since I changed, nothing could stop me from asking questions.

"Did Greg tell you all of this?"

"No. I have lived in this body, Bella, at this age for 200 years. I have personally lived through all the things that I am forbidding you from experiencing."

"Wait. Did you say _200 years_? You are _200 years old_?" I had gasped. He had laughed and shook his head against my legs.

"Let me explain. When you are born like this – as a vampire – you stop aging when you reach the age and body your conscience most desires. So my conscience most desired I remained eighteen forever."

"Would I age?" that was my greatest fear. To age and leave the people I loved the most, behind. I had begged Edward to change me, but he was stubborn and wanted to leave me as I was. As a human.

"No, you wouldn't, because I changed you when you were seventeen and you will remain seventeen. Forever."

I gasped as the pain in my head grew more pronounced, like somebody was walking around in there with stiletto heels. I got up and threw my books in my _Three Days Grace _concert shoulder bag, I had gone there the first year I became a vampire.

"Bella?" I shook my head at the voice. _That _voice. The soft, velvety voice that had sung me to sleep so many nights, the voice that haunted me, day and night.

"No, Edward. It's too late. Go away." I whispered. His hand shot out and stopped at my shoulder, holding me in place. For a second, I forgot about my super human strength. I forgot everything as his fingers traced small circles in my shoulder.

Wrenching free, I hissed, "Don't touch me!" his mouth hung open in a perfect 'o' of shock. His eyes filled with hurt, and his face crumpled. I stared at him, breathing hard.

"Edward, it's over! _You _ended it. _You _made the damage and now _you_ have to pay the price for it. I've paid mine long ago." I pointed at the half moon scar that was always a few degrees cooler than the rest of my body. We were cold skinned like Edwards clan, but not _that _cold. And we could walk in sunlight without causing a car crash.

"You're a vampire? Why? How?"

"That," the door to our Spanish class swung open and a voice hissed menacingly, "Is none of your business." Jason walked in, his beautiful eyes narrowed, his shoulder squaring.

Edward growled and took a step forward. I stepped in between them; my hands on Jason's muscular chest, my other hand extended not quite touching Edward, but close enough to feel the coolness vibrating off him.

"Jason, don't. He's not worth it." Jason grins down at me, like I just made his day and walks out, his thoughts whispered, _I'm waiting outside. _I smile up at him and turn back toward Edward, lowering my arm.

"It's too late. Don't break my heart again." Edward grimaces and then shrugs. Maybe he's letting go, I thought. But that changed when he grabbed me and kissed my lips once, twice, three times. I pushed him away roughly feeling dizzy. Edward smiled and disappeared.

I sank to the floor, and wrapped my arms around my knees, drowning the sobs. Jason walked back in and kneeled by my side; his arm snaked around my shoulder and pressed me to him. I gasped, as the wound in my heart slowly re-opened.

Would Jason be able to stitch me up again?


	3. Chapter 3

**Don't forget to review!! I luv reading what people write and think about my story!!**

**CHAPTER 3**

_The breath rushed out of his body as he lay in a heap on his bed. He had heard the conversation between Bella and her friend Kayla and those words . . . the words Bella had hissed stabbed at his heart._

_You know he's the only one for me,__ why? Why had he been so stupid? What did he think? That she would crave for him for the rest of his life? _Of course _not. He wanted her to be happy. But was this the right thing? The right choice? Would he ever love somebody as strongly as he had loved Bella again?_

_That stupid kiss did it. Ruined the last chance he had with her. He had broken her heart again, just by opening his mouth, and now she was God knows where, wrapped in that Naturals' arms._

"_Edward?" Alice walked into his room, hugging her sides. She sat next to him, ignoring his growls._

"_Edward, this can't go on forever! If you hadn't abandoned her-"_

"_I KNOW WHAT I DID! Stop torturing me with your stupid therapist crap! I know the mistakes I have made and now I have to live with them, right?" the therapist words were a blow below the belt. Alice stood up and turned away from him,_

"_You're right Edward. Keep acting the way you are, not letting anybody near you, pushing everybody who _cares _about you away. Do you think you are the only one who suffers? Jasper has thought of thousands of way of escaping, Carlisle is beside himself with worry, Esme can't stop talking about _her_ . . ., and what do you do? Act like you're the only one who is suffering." She swept elegantly out of the room, leaving Edward alone with his thoughts. _

_He turned towards the window and howled._

"Er, maybe this isn't a good idea, Kay." I hissed, "After all, he _is _older than you, and probably won't be interested-'' oops. Wrong thing to say. Kayla whirled around and glared at me spitting,

"OH, of _course_ he won't be interested! If it isn't about _you _then why should he be interested in little _me, _huh?" I stood, my mouth hanging open in shock. We were sitting in my car, listening to _someone's watching over me _by Hilary Duff.

Urgh, I _hate _that song! Mind you, I was never for the slow, happy music. I was more of a scream, thrash metal, rock music type of person. A _30 Seconds to Mars, _or, _Three Days Grace_, or _Kiss._

"Kayla, you got it totally wrong! That is _not _what I meant! What I meant was, don't get your hopes up! A guy like that probably has a horde of girls after him, and you don't want to look like one of _them _do you?" she shook her head and smiled. Her brown and blonde curls bounced on her shoulder as she sang along with the song.

_I found myself today,_

_Oh I found my self and ran away._

_But something pulled me back,_

_Voice of reason I forgot I had._

_And all I know is,_

_You're not here to say, _

_What you always used to say, _

_But it's written in the sky tonight . . ._

_So I won't give up,_

_No I won't break down,_

_Sooner than it seems,_

_Life turns around,_

_And I will be strong_

_Even if it all goes wrong . . ._ I ignored her singing as much as I could, tuning out here and there. The song sounded too much like it was about _me. _When Edward had pushed me away, I shouldn'tve given up, I should've listened to my subconscious. But I ran away, and hid among people who truly loved me. I had abandoned Charlie, my father, my flesh and blood.

I shouldn'tve done that. I should've stayed and fought my way back to the surface. But I didn't.

"Oh my God, there he is!" Kay squealed and pointed to the blonde figure walking towards a Porsche. As I had predicted, a gaggle of girls followed him a few steps behind. Kay got out of the car, and Javier turned lightly like she had called him. Did I mention that Kayla could control people's minds? That's why Javier was turning towards her, a flashy smile on his face.

Oh my God he is soooo hot. I got out of my car and hissed at Kayla, "What are you going to do now? I need to get back or Jason will kill me." Jason paid for my gas, and if I was out too long, the gas would run out and he would have to pay more. Money didn't grow on trees for him.

"Mmm, I don't know. What should I do?" she snapped.

"I don't know do I? You're the mind controlling freak here! Make him _do _something! Kiss him, ask him out, WHATEVER! Just do something." She sighed and walked toward Javier, batting her long eyelashes at him, and using a lame excuse about 'not understanding her homework'.

Damn, could she be more . . . stupid? My eyes snapped up as I heard a sudden laugh. Kayla had her arms drawn up behind her head, revealing a fair bit of stomach, and her crystal belly button. She was flashing a sexy smile at him that had the other girls swear at her under their breath.

Javier was staring. Jesus, his eyes were popping out of his head while he stared at the top of her chest. I turned away disgusted and got in my car, revving the engine. Kayla took the hint and kissed Javier's cheek before skipping my way.

"Wow, Kay, could you be more slutty? In front of all those girls, too! Half of the school will hate you for this." She shrugged happily and applied a second layer of Cherry Red lip-gloss. I groaned inwardly.

Jason was right. Kayla was so up herself, she could hardly look away from the mirror.

"Mmm, al least I got his phone number." She murmured, scrunching up her curls. She flipped something in my lap and I looked down, stupidly, forgetting that I was driving. I swerved to avoid a passing truck that reminded me so much of my own.

I picked up the piece of card I now saw was a photograph. Of Javier. Did he carry around his own photo? Wow, Kayla and him were a perfect match. On the back of the photo, a number was scrawled. It slanted slightly, giving off an air of a posh boy.

"Congrats, Kay. Now what? You gonna string him along? I know your games." Kayla laughed and patted my arm.

"Just because I don't get tied down, doesn't mean I have to _string him along_. I don't know. I might call him, and ask him about the homework . . ."

"Again?" I parked the car in front of our house and got out, tossing the number at Kayla again. It was getting dark already and I hurried inside, wishing that I had not gone out with her, Kayla didn't stop babbling about her 'victory',

"Of course not, silly. I would wait, wouldn't I? I'm not THAT needy." When she said needy, I knew exactly what she wanted from him and I gaped in horror. Jason walked out of the kitchen, staring at a piece of paper, and trying to make sense of the words.

"Bella, help me out. You love _Romeo and Juliet_." I rushed to his side, and looked over his shoulder. He grabbed me and kissed me on the lips, to which I was happy to follow. Kayla made an 'ew' sound and went to her room. When he finally let me go, I remembered to breath. He laughed and dragged me to the sofa, dropping his essay on the coffee table and wrapping his arms around me. He kissed my hair and my neck, his fingers moving down my neck, to my shoulder, down my arm, and stopping at my waist. He sighed happily and his thoughts whispered; _I am so sorry about today._

_About what? _I asked, baffled.

_I was going to knock him out, and I knew that I would've if you weren't there._

_Jez, if I wasn't there, then Edward wouldn't've been there and so you wouldn't've been there so you couldn't have hit anyone._ He laughed and kissed my neck. A shiver ran down my spine and I sank into his arms.

_Too bad you're only seventeen . . ._ he murmured. I playfully slapped him on the chest and he laughed again. Jason had this ridiculous rule about us not sleeping together until I was eighteen and legal. I saw absolutely no reason for this rule, as I was going to be seventeen forever.

"I know, but we'll pretend you're eighteen and _then _sleeping together won't be a problem" he had whispered.

Damn him and his rules.

_I lie on my bed waiting . . . I know they are close; I can hear the hissing of their tongues and the whispers of their bodies._

_The door swung open and they came in, wrapping themselves around my body and squeezing tight. A pair of red eyes stared at me unseeingly through all the blood . . ._

I screamed and jolted awake.

"You OK?" Ryan's voice soothed me.

"i-I'm f-fine." I stuttered. Jason shook his head and Ryan left, shrugging his shoulders.

"What's wrong? Was it that . . . that nightmare again?" I nodded and he lay beside me, wrapping himself around me, shielding, protecting me from any harm.

"Bella, honey, Bella, baby." He whispered until I fell into an agitated, dreamless sleep.

**Sorry if this chapter is long, or too short. I hope you enjoyed it and don't forget to review!!!! **


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4.**

Javier walked into the class, winking slyly at Kayla and making his way towards the front. Kayla smiled sexily at him. I ignored the pain slicing through my heart when Edward sat heavily in the seat next to mine. It seemed like he had forgotten what had happened yesterday.

Huh, good for him. _I _was going to give him the cold shoulder. That's all he deserved; for treating me like that and threatening Jason. Kayla was whispering something incoherent about Javier. I groaned silently and settled in my seat, my mind open to anyone who cared.

_Bella, can we talk? _My eyes snapped open and I glared at the source of the voice. How dare he?!?

_No. it's over. Get out of my head!_ I hissed. He didn't listen.

_Bella, you know it's not really over. You still love me._

_Love who. _It wasn't a question. It was a fact, and as he realised this, the pain edged into his eyes and face, making him look like a lost boy.

_Bella, I love you._

_Liar._

_I DO! Do you think I _wanted _to abandon you? It was for your own good!_

_Liar. _Edward's thoughts suddenly stopped and something shifted. Kayla didn't seem to notice as she was ogling Javier. My head was suddenly piercing with a screeching pain, and I opened my eyes to something I never wanted to see . . .

_I walked into the great white mansion on the river, a screech came from somewhere in the dark . . . Edward walked toward me, his arms extended, his eyes blood red from lust for blood, the thirst gripped him and slammed him into the monster he most feared . . . I shrunk back against the wall that was not there before. As I watched him, the walls begun to shrink and resize. Suddenly, there was no room left to run, or move._

_Edward moved his hand toward me, tracing my lips and running down my cheek. Blood gushed out of the small cut he made, and Edward leaned forward, like he was about to kiss me . . . I shrieked and as I moved out of his way, my body slammed with unnatural force into a great animal. Bigger than a grizzly, furrier than it, too. It growled at me, and its great paws lashed out at me, knocking me into unconsciousness . . . _

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?" somebody yelled.

"_I didn't do anything! _Why would I hurt her?" somebody hissed, his – I was sure it was male – voice increasing with the question. Something burned in my throat, and my eyes felt like they were _glued _close. I wanted to get up and see who was screeching and yelling.

"Why _wouldn't _you, huh?" the first person yelled. Feet approached me and somebody breathed on my neck. _Bella, _their thoughts whispered, _Bella honey, wake up and tell me what happened._

Slowly my eyes opened, and I saw with some distress that I was lying on the floor in my Spanish classroom. The two people screeching at each other were Kayla – who was being held in place by Javier – and Edward, whose face had an expression of murder on it. Jason kneeled beside me, and when he saw me waking up he smiled his relieved smile.

"Get me up." I croaked. His arms snaked around my waist and hauled me up, holding most of my weight. Edward turned around and saw me. His eyes lit up in relief but I glared at him, Jasper and Alice. Alice looked like she was about to cry.

"Kay, how could it be Edwards fault? She fainted! No big deal!" she whirled around to face him, her eyes burning with something indescribable.

"No _big deal_? Who are you KIDDING? Bella is my sister! Of _course _it's a big deal!" Javier looked taken aback, but quickly recovered. He saw me standing, my arms wrapped around Jason and he smiled.

"Are you OK? Maybe you should go to the nurse." Jason glared at the blonde teacher, his shoulders squaring.

"That won't be necessary." Jason picked my stuff up and threw it at Ryan, who caught it one-handed. Javier frowned.

"Look, she might be feeling sick, and the nurse could help-'' Jason's eyes snapped back up at him.

"I _said _that won't be necessary. I'll take her home. I think she's had enough education for one day." He steered me through the door and out into the empty corridor. Ryan beat us to the car, depositing my stuff in the backseat, before jogging back to his classroom. Jason was cold towards me, and I didn't know why.

"Jason?"

"What?" he snapped. I flinched and shrunk in my seat.

"Why are you like this?" he laughed a cold, harsh laugh. A laugh I didn't recognize.

"'why are you acting like this'?" he mimicked, "I'll tell you _why._ Because i'm sick of you and your stupid games and lies and tricks, OK? I don't give a _damn _about you anymore than I care about the rest of us, OK? You're a liar, a dishonest person. A _crook._" I gasped. What was going on? Where was the sweet warm Jason I had learnt to love?

"Jason, what are you _on _about?" I whispered.

"What am I _on about_? I'm on about you and that unwanted! That's who I'm on about!"

"What did I do?" I cried.

"You let him into your thoughts! Letting him pry in our most intimate secrets. You opened your _heart _to him!" I stared at him in shock. Was this what he thought of me? Did he think I . . . I betrayed him, with Edward? Was he nuts?

"Jason, pull over."

"No."  
" Jason, _pull over! _NOW!" I screeched. He stopped the car by the side of the now empty road, and I jumped out. My head reeled in protest. Jason stepped quickly out of the car and followed me.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"I am _not _going to go in a car with an insane psychopath! And I am NOT having this conversation with _you._" I yelled.

"A what? What did you call me?"

"You heard me! You think I was _letting Edward into my thoughts on purpose_? If you do recall, I was knocked out cold! You are such a jerk; I can't believe I'm actually listening to you and your crap!" Jason just stared at me. His thoughts whispered to me, _Bella honey, no! No no no! That's not what I meant! I'm sorry. So so sorry. _I shook my head and kept on walking. Jason tried to follow me, but I broke into a sprint.

"BELLA! BELLA! COME BACK! I'M SORRY, OK? I'M SORRY!" I ignored him and kept on running, throwing myself into the woods. I sobbed as I ran, letting my heart break open again. I listened to the animals around me as my feet carried me forward. I could hear Jason sobbing as he drove home. I could hear his heart breaking.

_What have I done? Why am I so stupid? Why did I listen to Kayla? Why? Why? Why?_ That stopped me. Kayla was behind this. I let my thoughts wonder around until I found what I was looking for.

_Huh, that was easy. It's not like I can have Javier for the rest of my life! He's human. But Jason . . . oh, Jason is too good for Bella. She doesn't give him enough. Besides, he can lose himself in the temptation with _me. _I don't mind. _She laughed, but her thoughts continued, _ah, maybe now I can have what I wanted the most . . . _

I gasped as I realised what she had done. She had controlled Jason's mind, _making _him say those things. Wanting him to break up with me. Something broke away from my neck. The gold chain with the crystal heart Jason had given to me last year for Valentine's Day.

I fell to my knees, scrambling around, and my hands feeling for the crystal heart in the dirt. I sobbed uncontrollably as I found the heart. It was smeared with dirt and the chain was snapped.

A twig snapped somewhere behind me and I hunched my shoulders, ready for whatever might be lurking after me.

A hand came down on my shoulder, pushing me into his chest.

"Ssh, it's OK. Everything is going to be OK." I sank into Ryan's warm chest. I cried and gasped for air until the sun went down. Ryan kneeled with me, stroking my hair, and whispering in my ear. His arms were warm and comforting.

"Why? Why would she do that? Ruin me like this? I'm l-living t-through it ag-gain . . ." I sobbed. Ryan held me tighter when he heard another twig snap. He stood up, making sure I was behind him.

Edward appeared from between the trees. His face was unreadable, his body tense, ready for a fight.

"Bella, we were _both _controlled. Do you think I would invade your privacy like this? You know I would never do that to you. I . . . I love you too much." Ryan growled. Edward ignored him and stepped closer to me, taking my arm. Ryan snapped his teeth at him and I shot a look at him, silencing him.

"Edward, I told you. It's over and there is nothing you could do about that. You broke your promise. You promised you would be there with me-''

"I promised I would be there until it was best for you. What happened with Jasper. . ." I laughed.

"What happened with Jasper was nothing, Edward. It could've happened to anyone. Admit it, you wanted a clean break from me," he shook his head and whispered,

"Bella, do you realise what you are saying? Are you insinuating that I didn't love you?"

"You said so yourself."

He sighed and took my hand pulling me closer. I looked around and saw that Ryan was gone, and that the sky was dark.

"Beautiful Bella," he chuckled, "I had to say that. I knew that if I left without hurting you, you would be pining after me. You would do stupid things to see if I cared enough to come back. I broke your heart, but it broke mine into a thousand pieces." He pulled me closer and his lips found mine, kissing me like he used to. Full of love and desire.

I gasped and pulled away.

"This isn't right. Edward please don't." he shook his head and leaned in, kissing me again, and this time I responded. I would my arms around his neck, crushing my body against his. His hands brushed through my hair, one hand tracing the shape of my body . . .

"Edward. I can't do this. Sorry." I pushed him away and ran. Ran back to my home, to the place where my heart was safe.


	5. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER 5.**

"Bella? Is that you?" Jason's voice rang out as I opened the door and steeped into the warm hallway. I didn't answer but walked into the kitchen, reaching up toward the shelf and grabbing a glass. Jason came into the kitchen, his hair messed from sleeping and his eyes round and sorry. He came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist. I moved away from him and poured some Coke in my glass, not looking at him in the face.

"Bella, please. I'm sorry for today. I-I wasn't m-me." he stuttered. I turned around to stare at him, my eyes unreadable – I hoped. His eyes were pleading with me. I shook my head and gulped down my Coke. My trousers were dirty with mud and grass stains.

"Bella, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me, OK? Don't let something as stupid as accidental words ruin what we have." I looked at him, and tears flooded my eyes. Jason thought the tears were for him and he took me into his arms, kissing my hair, my cheek and wiping away the tears. My mind was protected from him so he couldn't read what I was thinking.

Would he still think that way of me if he found out what I did? I sobbed uncontrollably in his chest. Ryan didn't know what I had done, so my secret was safe. Unless . . . Edward would tell. But I didn't believe that. I didn't believe that he would do something so horrid to me. He had kissed me and I kissed him back but . . . but that was an accident. The memories had done it. That's it. The memories had done it and I had no fault in what had happened.

I hugged him tight and he dragged me to the living room, pushing me down onto the sofa and kissing me like we only had a certain amount of time. It wasn't right.

I kissed him eagerly back, undoing the tope buttons of his shirt, but he stopped me when I went lower than his chest. He sighed against my cheek, and fell asleep, his lips pressed against my neck.

I cried myself to sleep.

I awoke to the sound of something spattering against the window. I got up, disentangling myself from Jason's arms and legs. He moaned softly but went back to sleep without a sound.

I walked quietly over to the window, running my fingers through my tangled hair. It was longer now than it was when I was with Edward. And it was darker, too. It was a reddish black now. And my eyes were a green blue like the rest of my 'family'. I hadn't heard from my real family since that night. I knew Charlie was crying for me. He was scared I died. But really I was more alive now than I ever was. My mother had remarried Phil and gone to live in Florida, and I hadn't heard from her since the day of the accident. The day I was attacked by a vampire called James and nearly died. Edward had stayed in my hospital room until I woke up and my mother was there. That was the last time I saw or heard from her. Phil made her feel young, so she probably forgot about me.

I peered out of the window and saw that the spattering noise was rain. Jason groaned from the sofa and I turned around to look at him, and was fascinated by who lay before me. He looked like an angel when he slept, his mouth a beautiful pout, his eyelashes brushing against his cheek. Tears spilled from my eyes as a voice whispered in my head, _you don't deserve him, Bella. You will break his heart one day and it'll be worse than when Edward left. _

Why was this voice making me feel guilty? I didn't kiss Edward back more than five seconds. Why did I feel guilty?

The rain splattered against the window harder than ever, like there was no tomorrow. My vampire senses told me it was going to rain all night. Actually all day, I thought as I glanced at the clock and saw it was 3.00am. Four hours before Jason would wake up.

I sat next to him on the sofa and his arms wrapped automatically around me, dragging me onto his chest. I put my head against his chest and fell asleep; listening to his heart faintly beat inside.

"Bella? Bella, come on. Wake up." Jason shook me, and my eyes popped open. He looked relaxed and he smiled at me, brushing a dead leaf from my hair.

"Wow, you look like a wood nymph." I smiled and kissed him.

"I'll take that as my cue to go shower." He laughed and stood up, stretching his arms above his head. His bones creaked and groaned as he started moving about again. He went to the kitchen and made some coffee. I glanced at the clock and saw with some surprise, that it read 11.00am.

"Jason? Is that clock right?" I asked. He came out of the kitchen, a mug in each hand and looked up at the clock. His mouth fell open, and he looked at his wrist watch which said 11.01am.

"Er, I guess it is?" laughing I ran up to the bathroom and had a quick shower before throwing on a black hoody, black skinny jeans and boots.

Jason was already waiting by the door, dressed brilliantly in a black polo shirt that showed off his six pack, and baggy jeans. He smiled when he saw me and threw my bag at me, yelling,

"Come ON! God, I hope they're going to let us in!" I laughed and followed him out.

"Yeah I know! But our guardians left early this morning for work, so we don't have a note." Jason explained to the reception lady. She looked at him, and her eyes travelled over his body.

_Well, it doesn't happen everyday that a handsome boy shows up in front of you, right? Better make the best of it._

I sighed and pushed Jason aside, who grunted indignantly. Smiling at the receptionist in a not very friendly manner I explained, "Look, I know you would love to sit there and stare at my brother all day, but right now, we have a lesson and if you want to stare at him some more, why not wait until he gets in trouble and has to see the head teacher? And by the way, there _is _a law about perving on eighteen year olds, especially when you are in your . . . what are you in? Your fifties?" Jason laughed and the lady gasped, shoving a late slip my way.

"Er, two? For my brother." She slammed another slip in front of me and closed the window which she talked through to us. Jason laughed again and put an arm round my shoulder, he whispered, "I didn't know my _sister _was so jealous of her _brother._" I lifted a hand, silencing him.

"Excuse me; she was looking at you in a way that _should _be illegal."

"So that law on perving on eighteen year olds is a lie?" I shrugged and poked him in the ribs.

"I don't know, do I? I'm a mythical creature, not a lawyer!" he laughed again and squeezed me to him. We walked past the English corridor and Edward was standing out side a class room. He looked at me, with something in his eyes, hinting about the bother evening. I cuddled closer to Jason, who ignored Edward and pushed me in the general direction of my Spanish class. His was a few doors down, so he had time to kiss me without anybody seeing.

I stuck my tongue out at him and walked into the classroom. Javier was talking about Madrid and the culture. Everything in Spanish, of course.

Edward walked in a second later, dropping a pile of sheets on the main desk. Javier smiled gratefully at him and carried on with his lesson. The girls were hanging on every word he was saying, while the boys looked disgusted or bored.

I sat down and pretended to not notice Kayla. She nudged me and whispered, "Hey, you think I should make him ask me out in front of everybody?" I shrugged and she glared. Edward sat down and his thoughts called to me.

_I'm sorry about yesterday. I don't know what had gotten into me, _he said. He looked sheepish.

_You better thank god I didn't tell Jason. Don't EVER do that again, OK? From now on, you and I are back to what we were before. Nothing._

Edward smiled apologetically and shrugged his shoulder. Somehow, I knew it wasn't over yet.

"Kayla? We need to talk." Kayla looked at me uncertainly and then smiled.

"Sure."

"We have to meet Jason first, though." Her lips twitched, but she kept her smile perfectly in place. I pushed her out of the door and walked along the corridor to where Jason was standing, hands in pockets, a thoughtful look on his face. A few girls were hanging around him, and when I wrapped my arms around him, they disappeared.

"Jason? We three need to talk." He looked worried for a second and I dragged them both into a music room, shutting the door behind me. Jason stood next to me, while Kayla took a seat next to the drums. I had a feeling Kayla knew what this was going to be about, and I also knew that she had a comeback.

"Jason, this is about yesterday," he inhaled a sharp breath and I continued, "I know you didn't mean those things. I know you, and you would never treat me like that. I think Kayla owes you an apology." His eyes trailed to Kayla who was tapping the drum impatiently.

"Why? Because I want him to myself? I think you aren't treating him right, Bella. I mean, look what you did yesterday with Edward . . ." she trailed off slyly. Jason rose an eyebrow at me and if I was human, I would've blushed.

"What is she talking about, hon?" I shook my head at him, but he wouldn't take the hint,

"What I'm _talking _about, Jez, is Bella's little . . . _encounter _with Edward Cullen." That was below the belt. I took a step toward Jason and grabbed his hand. He looked down at me, confused. Kayla stood up and licked her lips.

"You know, your dear _Bella _hasn't been very faithful to you." Jez wrenched his hand out of mine and jumped back. My mouth opened in shock as I understood what Kayla was doing.

"Jason, let me explain!" Kayla laughed.

"Explain what? The way you kissed Edward as soon as Ryan had gone? Or the way you liked it and yearned for more?" Jez stared at me, running his hands through his hair. He looked like he was about to cry.

"So what I said yesterday was true! You are a liar, a dishonest person a . . . crook!"

"No! No, Jason! Of course not! I love you! You never said those things yesterday! It was Kayla; she was controlling your mind! You told me yourself that you weren't yourself. I know who you are and what . . ." I trailed off. He was shaking his head at me, his eyes turned away from mine.

"No Bella. I can't go on like this. I can't go on living with you, and kissing you and loving you, knowing that you betrayed me, that you went behind my back."

"Jez, I didn't! I would _never do that_!" tears spilled down my face as I tried to persuade him back onto my side, but I knew it was all lost. My heart crumbled and I fell to the floor.

"Bella, you said you were never going to take the necklace off." He whispered.

"T-the c-chain b-broke." I fished the chain and crystal out of my pocket. He reached down and snatched it out of my hand, rubbing the crystal between his fingers and letting the shards fall to the floor. He walked out, slamming the door behind him.

Kayla kneeled next to me and tried to put her arm round my shoulder, but I pushed her away.

"Why would _you do that_? I loved him! I loved him and you killed what little we had." I sobbed and buried my head in my arms

"I-I thought it was wrong of you to lead him on. He really _does _love you. And he'll take you back."

"Kayla, go away before I do something I might regret." Kayla scrambled to her feet and rushed to the door, slamming it behind her.

Leaving me in the dark, the way it all started.


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER 6.**

I walked out of the dark music room a few minutes later. I made my way to the car and stepped in, starting the ignition. Tears spilled from my eyes as the rain came down harder than ever. Students were running about, trying to get to cover before they got to wet.

I drove home, crying. She had ruined everything for me. This time I _wanted _to die. This time, I'd make sure nobody was there to help me survive, like that night when Edward had left me by myself in the woods.

Parking the car, I went into the hallway, making as little noise as possible. I dropped my leather jacket on the floor, and ripped my boots off. I was completely soaked through. I ran up to the bathroom, showering quickly and stepping into warm trakkies and baggy t-shirt. I ripped my fingers through my hair, undoing all the knots; closing my eyes, I saw again and again the way the shards of crystal fell to the floor. It was like Jason had crumbled my heart as well.

Oh well. He'll see the mistake he made soon enough.

I went into the kitchen and made myself a mug of hot chocolate before thinking of my 'suicide' plan.

"You won't do it. I won't let you." The mug fell from my hands and crashed to the floor, sending hot chocolate all over the place.

"Yes I can, and I will. There is no point hanging around." I choked out.

"You won't do it. You are too scared of killing _him _as well."

"No I'm not. I don't give a damn anymore. He chose her over me. He trusted _her _more than her trusted _me_." I started to pick up the shards of china from the wooden floor.

"You speak in the past. You should speak in the present. It isn't over yet"

"It was over the night you left." I looked into Edwards topaz eyes. He stared back, reaching out for me. I looked away, throwing the broken china into the bin.

"Don't do this. He isn't worth it. If he chose Kayla over you, then he hasn't got his mind at peace. I was stupid to abandon you in the first place, but he is being ridiculous treating you the way he is."

"Edward, I'm losing faith in myself and others because of _you. _If I hadn't met you in the first place, if I hadn't looked at you that way all those years ago, if I wasn't so interested, if . . ." he put a hand over my mouth, silencing me.

"Your mind is fall of ifs. You shouldn't torment yourself like that." He leaned in closer so our lips were nearly touching.

"I'll stay with you tonight, Bella. Whether you like it or not. I'm not going to let you harm yourself over _him._" I started to cry then; he gathered me into his stone cold arms and kissed my hair, my cheek my neck. His kisses were nothing like Jason's. I kissed him back, knowing that Jason would kill Edward if he saw, and then I could step in between letting Jason kill me instead . . .

Edward's lips crushed into mine, "I will always love you Isabella Swan. No matter what, when and why." He whispered against my lips. I sighed and pressed myself harder against him. Edward couldn't hear other vampires on their way, but _I _could. I heard the sound of Kayla's Porsche pulling into the driveway, and then running feet up the steps. Edward pulled away fast and stared at the front door which was slowly creaking open. I grabbed a knife out of the drawer behind me and slid it into my pocket.

"_Are you sure this is right? After what she did to you? Jason, think!"_

"_This is not the right thing, but I can't let her _die_, can I?"_

"_Why not? We'll all be better off without her."_ The door slammed and footsteps came towards us. Jason appeared in the doorway and saw me standing with one hand in my pocket, leaning heavily on the counter. Edward was standing motionless near the fridge, his eyes fixed on Kayla, watching her every move.

"Bella, don't be an idiot." Jason said, walking towards me. I tuned him out and slid the knife from my pocket, playing around with it. Running my fingers over the sharp side.

"I'm not going to commit suicide. I'm not _that _desperate." I muttered. Edward visibly relaxed. Jason growled and came toward me, my hand tightened around the knife. He stopped in his tracks. Edward sucked in a breath.

"Bella put the knife down. This is not going to help" Edward whispered. My eyes skidded over to him. His body was tense, ready to lunge at me if necessary. I dropped the knife and sighed heavily. My life was full of tears. Why did I feel so unhappy? Edward was beside me in a second, his arms wrapping around me.

"What are you doing? Get your hands off her!" Jason growled.

"She isn't safe here. I'm taking her to my place."

"Oh, she's safer here than anywhere on this damn planet!" I buried my head in Edwards's chest and whispered, "Jason, you trust Kayla over _me. _If you really loved me, nothing would've mattered."

"So you did kiss him?" he thundered.

"No, she didn't. I kissed _her._ She pushed me away, and I recall her saying 'this isn't right. It's over' but if you really loved her, you would've listened to her." Edward hissed. His eyes narrowed and Jason growled. Kayla grabbed his arm and shook him hard.

"Jez, you said it was over! Let her go, then!" Jason shrugged her off and took a step toward us.

"Jason, please stop it!" I whispered. His eyes turned on me and I melted. He looked so sad and lonely, that I wanted to jump into his arms and make it all better. _Don't leave. I've been a jerk to listen to Kayla. I know you would never hurt me. I'm sorry I hurt _you._ I love you. _He whispered. Fresh tears pooled my eyes. Edwards's arms tightened around me and he heaved me onto his back. Jason roared and launched himself at us. Edward jumped out of the way, throwing himself out of the window and running down the road.

"Edward! Put me down! What are you _doing_? PUT . . . ME . . . DOWN!!!" Edward ran onto a forest the wind whipping my face. I swore at him all the way tohis house, forgetting that I was with him at last. All I could do was calm Jason down with my thoughts.

_Jason, don't do anything stupid. Please! I'll come back tonight. Please!_

_Honey, come back NOW! You're a vampire, and you can beat him to it. You are stronger than him. Come back . . ._

_**No don't come back. I think you've had enough for one day, correct? Leave Jason free, Bella. He could be soooo much happier with me **_Kayla screeched.

A shooting pain went through my head and I blacked out, screaming.

_Black snakes slithered around the door, hissing and spitting. A pain I was not familiar with shot through my chest, grabbing my heart and slamming it against my rib cage. I screeched in pain, and a light laugh came from somewhere in the darkness. _

"_Jason!" I screamed. His voice was far away, but it was soothing._

"_Bella? It's OK. Everything is going to be just _fine._ Don't give up and fight your way to the surface." I whimpered as one of the reptiles wound itself around my legs, dragging me under the surface. The water was dense and black, but as I sunk, the unmistakable smell of blood reached my nose. I looked down, and saw that what were snakes dragging me down, were now corpses. Their eyes wide open and white, their mouths leaking blood . . ._

I woke up and saw seven pair of eyes stare down at me. They were all topaz, and as my vision cleared, I saw that they were all painfully . . . familiar.

"No." I whispered. _No no no no no no nonononononononono. _I continued to yell in my mind. Carlisle Cullen kneeled beside me and touched my neck lightly.

"No." I whispered again. When he reached round to touch the other side of my neck, I snapped my teeth at him. Carlisle flinched and pulled his hand back. The topaz eyes were unreadable. I looked round and saw Edward kneeling on my other side.

"You _arse hole!_ How DARE you? How dare you take me away from my _family?_" I screeched. Jumping to my feet, I took a swing at him and he jumped neatly out of the way. His eyes were murderous but he laughed.

"Wait that was your 'family'? With the cow that controls minds and made your life hell? With the guy you say you _love_, who doesn't even believe you when you defend yourself? With two _guardians _who are never there? Wow, some family." He sneered. I stepped forward and made myself look all guilty. He softened and came a little closer.

I grabbed his shoulder and punched him in the stomach. He went down and I felt nothing inside me except quiet rage. I whirled round to face Jasper and hissed, "Take me back." He shook his head and disappeared. Alice touched my arm and said,

"Bella, don't go. We've missed you."

"Oh, whatever." I shrugged from her grip, and she looked like I'd slapped her.

"Bella, you have to understand that we left for your own good." Carlisle said calmly. Edward recovered from the blow and stood up, brushing himself off. He looked hurt – morally – and looked away from me. Emmett went to stand by his brother and Edward pulled him away.

"My own good? Look what I have _become_! When you left, I wanted to _die_. That's what you drove me to; you drove me to the point of trying to kill myself."

"Don't be ridiculous Bella! You always wanted to become one of us." Rosalie growled.

"One of _you. _Not one of the Naturals, OK? I wanted to live _your life_. Not this life. I mean, I am torn between human and vampire, and it's painful." Edward walked back into what I gathered was the living room.

"You are not going back tonight Bella. It's too dangerous." He murmured.

"What exactly do you know about danger? You _run away from it._ I've lived with them these past two years and I know more of them than you might find out with your stupid mind reading abilities. Jason is a sweet and gentle person and I know he would never physically hurt me. Kayla can just go to hell, and I know Greg will punish her for what she did-''

"Those are not vampires! They are animals! How can you live with them?" I turned to stare at jasper.

"They are my family now, whether you like it or not. It's over between us, I have nothing left to say." With that, I turned on my heel and walked out of the room, heading purposefully toward the door. Feet thundered behind me and the scent told me Edward was on trail.

"If you even dare touch me, I'll break your ribs, got it?" Edward sighed and ignored what I said touching me gently on the arm. I slammed the door, and stepped outside. It was cold and my vampire senses told me that it would snow tonight. Inside, I broke. I wanted to curl up on the floor and cry my heart out. I wanted Jason; I wanted his arms around me and his voice telling me he loved me and only me.

And what do I get instead?  
Stupid, arrogant, ignorant, betraying Edward Cullen.

I tipped my head back to stop the tears from falling and found myself in the middle of nowhere. Trees made a type of wall at all sides of me and the only way to get out was blocked from Edward's body.

He saw me on the edge of tears and his arms folded around me. I struggled, trying to push him away, but only succeeded in him kissing my hair and brushing the tears away.

"Edward, _don't!_" I sobbed into his chest.

"I love you Isabella Swan. And nothing can stop me from protecting you and trying to make amends to what I did to your heart" I cried harder. Edwards's type of vampire can't cry but _we_ can. After all, we are partially human.

"I know you hate me, but do you think this is crucial? In your own way. You have already punished me. Do you think I enjoyed these two years away from you? I did my best to forget you. I went with other vampire girls, I ran away and hid in Alaska where there no memories of you . . . I did my best, but . . . you are here and so am I and there is nothing to stop my not beating heart from loving you now." He kissed my head and whispered, "Ssh, everything is going to be OK." I hugged him tight, trying to bring back the old Bella he had once laughed at her stupid babbling. Through the tears that wouldn't go away, I looked up at him and met his lips with mine. He held me tight, not worried now about crushing all my bones, and kissed me harder than ever.

"Don't let me stay here, I can't live with It." he sighed and hugged me closer.

"Just for tonight. We'll go in when they are out hunting, and you can sleep in my room. No one would dare go in if they didn't want to die" I laughed, hoarse form all the crying, and nodded. He then proceeded to kiss me some more.

I was broken, split in two.

One side desired for Edward, and his old ways that, made me dizzy to think about.

The other desired for my healer. The guy who had adored me and kissed me at night when I woke up from nightmares. The guy who was at home now, being comforted by the slutty Kayla. The guy who was now pushing her away and standing up, thinking of me. . .

And only me.


	7. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER 7**

I woke up and found myself in what was unmistakably Edwards' room. The long curtains were drawn close, shielding the room from any sunlight. I lay in a king sized bed, with a black and red cover over me. A black leather couch was situated under the closed curtained window.

Edward was reading peacefully, his bronze hair falling gently over his eyes as he flipped the page over. He smiled at something in the book and closed it with a low slapping sound. His eyes automatically turned to where I lay, my eyes wide open.

"You're awake." He stated. If I were human, I would've blushed at his carefulness. Actually, if I were a human, I would've blushed at everything. The way he looked at me, the way I found myself sitting up in his bed, the way I was sitting up in his bed in his room in his _house._ With his parents just a few doors down. I knew, though, that no one was home.

I nodded at what he said and got up slowly from the bed. My head hurt something rotten, like I was just recovering from a hang over. Thankfully, I was still wearing the trakkies and baggy t-shirt from yesterday.

Edward frowned and walked over to me, "I would never touch you when you are defenceless." I looked away from his penetrating gaze, and walked to the window. I opened the curtains and peeked out. A single ray of sunshine filtered through the gap, and lit the place where Edward stood.

His skin glinted like thousands of diamond were sewn into his body. I stared at him in awe and he smiled.

"Remember when . . ."

He laughed and walked towards me, "Bella, I remember _everything _of that day. The day in the meadow."

"You named it our meadow." He nodded and shifted so he stood in front of his wardrobe. He opened the two wooden doors and sifted through his many shirts. He replaced the white shirt he was wearing with the hoody. I averted my eyes, making sure to look at anything but him.

His chuckle reached across the room to my ears, "Bella, you wanted to take my clothes off for me, and you are embarrassed that I am changing shirts?" I smiled shyly and he came closer, brushing a loose strand of hair, tucking it behind my ear.

"Beautiful Bella. Why did I leave you?" I looked into his eyes and saw that he was genuinely confused. His mind was miles away, back to the day in the meadow. I remembered that day clearly. It was the day he showed me what sun would do to his skin.

"Because I wasn't _good enough _for you." His eyes snapped back to reality and looked down at me

"Actually, I said you weren't good for me."

"Huh, same thing."

"What I meant was, you weren't good for my _health,_" I laughed harshly. And he was good for me? Taking me away from the people who I most loved? Yeah, right.

"I think you should take me back, now. Please" I added as an afterthought. Edward hung his head and walked away.

"You know, I wish you'd do something for _me. Just for me._"

"Edward, I devoted my life to you. And you threw it away. Don't you think it's time we _both _move on?" I spat. He turned around, his eyes flaring in anger. In a minute, he was standing close to me.

"Don't you dare tell me what I should or shouldn't do! I loved you, I love you! You can't tell a man to _move on _when he is in love with the only person who is stopping him from _moving on_!"

"Don't be so melodramatic. It was your choice. As I said, I paid my price, now you pay yours." He cupped my chin and a shiver ran down my spine.

His lips moved against my neck, going up and up until the found my lips.

I moved away, knowing that Jason was waiting for me.

He sighed and walked out, making a soft thumping sound as he made his way down the stairs. I rushed after him, stepping into my trainers on he way.

He was waiting patiently by the door, one hand in his pocket, the other jangling a pair of keys against his leg.

Could life get any more complicated? He was standing by the door, looking as sad and lonely as Jason had yesterday. This time, though, I didn't hesitate to hug him. He held me tightly, his face buried in my hair.

"I'll take you home now, Bells." He let me go and went to his car, his shoulders hunching against the wind. His skin sparkled and I was worried he was going to get us hurt with the amount of light flashing off him. From the driver's side, he pulled out a pair of gloves and pulled his hood down over his eyes. Every part of skin was covered, and the light couldn't reach his face.

I got in and Edward started the car.


	8. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER 8.**

Edward or Jason? Jason or Edward? Love or lust?

Because that was the truth. I didn't _love _Jason, I lusted fro him, the exact same way when I haven't hunted for weeks on end and I find an appealing animal. He satisfied me the way I liked it. We hadn't made 'love' yet, and I don't think that would happen between us. Making 'love' is about going to bed with the guy you _love. _And I just figured out that I didn't love Jason.

He was too . . . I don't know. He was too much for me, I guess. He _suffocated _me, to put it in an easy to understand and cruel way.

When I was around Edward, I knew I could open my heart to him and tell him everything I could, everything I _wanted. _I knew he wouldn't find me ridiculous and I knew he wouldn't laugh at me.

I had a feeling I wasn't the only one for Jason as he stated I was.

And I was certain about it when I got home that day, after Edward dropped me off.

I walked to the kitchen and opened a cupboard, taking out a clean glass and topping it with coke. Jason was laughing as he came into the kitchen, wearing nothing other that a pair of ripped jeans. Following him, – surprise surprise – was Kayla. _She _was wearing nothing but a baggy T-shirt. They both blushed when they saw me in the kitchen, drinking calmly from a glass of coke.

"Hey, guys." I said, keeping my voice light.

"Bells, hon, I can explain."

"Oh, no worries. It's OK. I know about your striptease, yeah? It's fine. Really." Jason had been smiling as I had said 'oh no worries' but it quickly faded as I threw the striptease favour in it.

"We weren't doing anything, Bells! Er, Kayla asked me to help her find something to wear for tonight. You know, Greg and Lilly wanted us all to go out and eat as a family." He tried to laugh the real problem at hand, off.

"And you needed to get your clothes off, too." It wasn't a question. It was a fact.

"Yeah – no! No, of course not." He stammered.

"Uh-huh. Anyway, tell Greg and Lily that you'd be the only one joining. I've already got plans." I washed the glass out and put it back to its place. I had lied of course but he wasn't to know that.

"Whaddya mean? Our guardians have been trying to work this out for ages. You can't bail out on us." He said. He knew that I was trying to get away from them. From him.

"Oh, I can and I will. Tell Ryan to meet me at the park ten minutes after he comes in." I looked into his hurt filled eyes and saw how _false _he was.

"Don't go." He whispered.

"No worries. Go back into your room and play striptease. I bet Kayla was loving it, right Kay?" I smiled at her and she looked like she was about to cry.

Ooh, what I mean, mean person I was! Oh well. They'll get over it.

I walked up to my room and started throwing stuff in a big black-blue gym bag. I threw everything I could that would fit, in it. photos – not of Jason or the family, my old ones, the ones I had hid – clothes – not the ones Jason liked – shoes – again, not the ones Jason said he liked – ornaments, . . . everything that fit, I would throw in. Jason stood in the doorway trying to convince me to stay. I ignored him as best as I could . . . and that's when I saw that my bed was unmade. I had made it up the day before I slept at Edwards's house. I stared at it a second and then my eyes travelled up to meet Jason's gaze. He looked away when I said,

"I don't mind you shagging Kayla, but did you _really _have to do it in my room? Your room is, like, fifty times larger than mine, with a bigger bed to satisfy Kayla's desires. Go on and snap my heart in smaller pieces it already is." I hissed.

"Babe, com on! It didn't mean anything." He yelled. I went up to him, and as I did with Edward, I made myself look all innocent and loved up, but then betrayed the look with a good punch in the stomach that sent him to the floor.

I kneeled and whispered in his ear, "Don't fuck with me, Jason. You'll be hearing from me." he gasped, and tried to grab my hand. I stamped on it, hard, and smiled as I heard the boned snap. Too bad, they won't stay broken too long.

He cried out and called for my name as I walked down the stairs and to the door. Kayla was blocking it.

"Bells, you don't understand. Let me explain." I stopped her by raising my hand in the universal sign of stop.

"Whatever, slut. Get out of my way."

"No. don't dump Jason! He's a good guy. You'll kill him like this."

"Good. Rot in hell, bitch. Now move." She shook her head and I took out my last resort. I spat in her face and pushed her away. She cried out in pain and fell to the floor, clutching her face.

Did I mention that us vampire/humans have spit that is acid? Yeah, Kayla wouldn't have a pretty face to flaunt around for long.

I know it was cruel and mean, but think about it, can you blame me? The first tells me I am 'the only one' and then goes and shags my supposed best friend. The other ruins my love life and then wants to be my friend. I mean, yeah right. Like I was going to go shopping with _you, _sucker.

I jogged to my car and got in, throwing the bag in the backseat. I didn't even bother putting my belt on, but sped away, knowing that if a police officer stopped me I was going to get speeding tickets galore.

But that was the old Bella. The Bella that cared.

This was the new Bella. The Bella that didn't give a damn


	9. Chapter 9

**CHAPTER 9.**

I waited for Ryan at the local park, on a metal rung bench.

Right when I thought that he wasn't going to show up, he walked through the small kiddy gates and made his way over to me. I had started to think that maybe what I did was wrong, and that maybe I should go back.

But admit defeat in less than 24 hours? Nuh-uh. No way. That was the old Bella. The Bella who gave up at any sort of obstacle.

But the new Bella? Yeah, she wasn't going to admit defeat, not without a war.

Ryan saw me and a slow smile spread across his handsome face. _Good. Does that mean he doesn't hate me?_

He sat down next to me and patted my leg.

"What did you want to see me for?" he asked, the smile going wider with every word. I looked at him, and then at the hand that rested lightly on my leg.

"Urgh . . . ah . . . I need a j-job." I stammered. Only Ryan could have this effect on me! Why did I stammer and trip over my own words when he touched me?

_Maybe because he's the only one who ever acted brotherly with you. Jason swept you off your feet the first chance he got._ Probably.

Did I mention that Ryan was a job expertise? He could walk into a shop, or restaurant or bar and simply say, 'hey guys, you got a job for me?' and voilá! A job on one arm and tons of cash on the other. Money _did _grow on trees for my dear Ryan.

"A job?" he asked. He stroked his chin for a second, probably sifting through his mind to find a proper job that might interest me, before answering, "Yeah. Yeah, I've got a job for you. The new Italian restaurant down the road from our place, you know?"

"Bella Italia?" I asked.

"Yeah. Yeah, that's the one. Beautiful Italy . . . perfect name. They're looking for a waitress, I think. Bella, explain." He suddenly demanded. I was shocked for a second before answering in what I hoped was a calm and reasonable tone,

"Ryan, this thing with Jason has gone on too long, y'know? When I got home this morning, he . . . he . . . I don't k-know h-how t-to ex-explain." I sobbed, dropping my head in my hands. Ryan stroked my back as I cried and whispered,

"S'OK. You don't have to tell me. If it's too hard to explain, then don't tell me."

"I w-want to." I took a deep, shuddering breath and lifted my head from my hands, looking at him in the eye as I said so.

"Jeasonhadbeeninbedwithkaylatheslutandididwhaticouldandranformylife." I said the words so fast, that they all muddled and jumbled up, so they sounded like one long word.

Ryan stared at me for a second, his expression confused.

"OK. Do you mind repeating that calmly? So I can understand?"

"Jason had been in bed with Kayla the slut and I did what I could and ran for my life."

"Huh, sounds like Jason, all right. But why would you run away from something like _that_?"

"It's not the fact that he was going behind my back – even though that was a blow below the belt – but more the fact that he did it with Kayla, that he did it when he said he loved me and begged me to come home, when he haunted my mind when Edward stole me away and carried me to his house. I trusted him, Ryan. But it looks like I can't trust anyone anymore."

"But you don't love him" he stated.

"No. I think I _lust _for him, but not love him." _Not like, I would ever love Edward. _That was left unsaid, but I think Ryan understood. He nodded and took one of my hands tightly in his.

"Isabella Swan, I know what Jason is like, and I know how horrible he can be, and as a promise, I will stay by you and help you out when you need, OK?"

"OK."

"Oh, I saw what you did to Kayla's face-'' I sucked in a sharp breath, prepared to hear for the damage I had done, "Too bad she can cover it up with a little bit more of foundation than usual. You marked her pretty badly, from the bridge of her nose to the tip of her chin. And I think you damaged Jason pretty badly, too. Not only are his knuckles and fingers broken, but he was . . . _crying _when I walked in. I thought that sounded a bit wrong, coz it's usually the girls that cry and not the guys." I saw that he hadn't let go of my hand. His brownish tan looked exotic in my pale gold hand. His skin looked a little like burnt honey, whilst mine looked like fresh honey.

_Why am I thinking about how weird our skin looks together when I should feel a little sorry for Jason?_

_Because you don't love him, DUH!_

"Come on. I'll show you the way to the restaurant. Oh, another question. Why do you need a job so badly?"

"I'm not coming back home, Ry. And I need money to get an apartment, and then maybe to get out of this shit-hole like town."

"So, I'll only ever be able to see you in school?" he asked incredulously.

"No. you can stop by sometime if you want. I'll tell you when I find a place, OK?" he nodded and showed me the way to the restaurant.

The restaurant was a lovely little place right at the corner of the street.

_Bella Italia, _the gold plaque indicated. Underneath it, in smaller writing, it read _stay in or take out. _So this was a takeaway, too? Brill.

I went in and walked up to the counter that was made out of old stone, so it looked a lot like a stonewall. Behind it was a small fire, and a man with a big stomach and friendly eyes stood, sorting out an old oven, feeding it wood and coal. A young man in his teens was taking out Pizza's and boxing them.

"Erm, excuse me? Sir?" I asked, shyly. OK, I liked this place and I was going to get a job here,

Whatever it took. I looked around as I waited for the man with the big stomach to listen to me. There were lots of pictures of various places in Italy. The leaning tower of Pisa, the Colosseum, and a black and white picture of a man in an army suit, his arm extended like he was saying hello to the whole of Rome. I knew it was Rome, coz there was the Colosseum.

"Ah, Benito Mussolini. Great man. The best Prime Minister Italy could ever have had." The man with the big stomach came toward me, looking at the big picture, wiping his hands on his apron.

"Oh. Did he fight in the world war?" I asked. Maybe if I got him on my good side, it would be easier to get a job.

"Yes, he did. The whole of Italy loved him. That is, until he was killed by Hitler's SS." The man smiled at me and took my hand in his, shaking it gently.

"Michele Giovanotti, chef of the restaurant, at your service." If I was human, I would've blushed, but I smiled sweetly and said,

"Hi, I'm Isabella Swan and I heard you are looking for someone who can waitress for you in the evenings? I can understand why it might get busy around here." I added, running my eyes over the place.

"Well, yes. We _do _have jobs available here. But may I ask you how old you are?" I was surprised by how _kind _he seemed. Not like the other people, I worked for. They were all stuck ups and thought of themselves as the ones and only's. The men I worked for were all the same. They had all been picked out by Jason himself.

"I'm seventeen nearly eighteen."

"Ah, well. Then why not? The uniform is basic you see. Just a pair of black trousers and a white shirt would do. Nothing flashy, nothing cashy."

"Oh, brilliant! Thank you so much, sir!"

"Oh, please. Call me Mike." The name Mike reminded me of my friend Mike back in Forks and the thought hurt. If I hadn't fallen for Edward so badly, then maybe I wouldn't be a vampire, and then maybe I wouldn't have to fight so hard, for what I wanted.

"Mike, then."

"You can start tomorrow. If you come over at five, then Sav can talk you through the jobs and everything you need to know, yes?" I nodded and made my way to the door, lightly pushing down on the gold handle and stepping into the road. My car was parked round the corner. Thank you God for letting me park there. The might think how weird it was when I was looking for a job and drove round in a Camarro.

I got in and started the engine. Rain started to fall down full pelt and I groaned in frustration.

I needed somewhere to stay, and I needed it fast.


	10. Chapter 10

**CHAPTER 10.**

My last resort was Edward.

I didn't want to go back to him, scared that I might throw myself into his arms, kiss him, and say many things I might regret later on.

On the other hand, what choice did I have?

I could book into a hotel of course, but I only had $500 on my bank account, and that would be gone before I realise it. Between gas for my car and a room, that money wouldn't last more than a week. I sighed as I drove aimlessly around, keeping an eye on the little arrow indicating of the gas got too low.

I stopped at a gas station, doing a full fill that cost me $40. (**A/N: I don't live in USA so I don't know if this is right. If you know the right price, can you please tell me? Thx.**)

I was left with $460.

I took out a pad of paper and a pen from my bag and I wrote down how much money I would use and how much I would need before I died of cold and hunger. I could live in blood for a couple of weeks, but how long would it take before I turned into a monster?

Not long was the only answer I came up with.

If my calculations were correct, I would use $400 of my money, which left me with £60. And that would mean that I had to go back to The House and get the rest of my hidden money. I had about £300 at The House.

Knowing Jason, that money should be gone by the time I went for it.

I thumped the steering wheel in frustration and heard a faint tap on the glass. I turned my eyes on the glass and saw Edward smiling at me. He was soaked through and I smiled, opening the passenger door for him.

"Thanks." He said as he got in, trying to keep the water off the seats. I threw the pad and paper at the back, where it landed on my bag making a low _thump. _Edward twisted round so he could look into my eyes as he spoke.

"I heard." He murmured, brushing a strand of hair from my face and tucking it behind my ear. I leaned my face toward his hands, bathing in the weird warmth I felt radiating from it. He drew comforting circles on my jaw with his long fingers that were calloused.

"Do you still play?" I whispered. Edward used to play the piano, and one of his compositions he dedicated to me. My lullaby.

"Yes." his voice was much closer now, and I opened m eyes to see him staring at me with something like sadness in his eyes.

Instinctively, I grabbed his face in my hands and kissed the tip of his nose. He laughed and brushed his lips against mine.

"Don't go." I whispered. It was weird hearing the words coming out of my mouth. The same words Jason had whispered to me, earlier that day.

"I'll stay with you, forever." He whispered back, his lips moving against my ear.

"Promise?"

"Promise." I kissed him then. A real kiss on the mouth. He kissed me back like ha hadn't done in years.

He grabbed my waist with one hand, and pulled me onto his lap with the other. Hs lips ran down my neck and up again. The rain was coming down so hard outside that nobody could see what was going on inside even if they wanted to.

My hands went under his shirt, caressing the hard skin. He kissed me harder, putting so much _want _in it that it nearly made me explode.

He did the right thing and pulled away, before I went crazy.

He laughed when he saw the relief on my face and kissed my cheek once more.

"You haven't got a place to stay." He stated, I nodded and pulled down my shirt, which had ridden up higher than it should go. He brushed the hair off my face and said the words I wanted him to say,

"Come live with me. I've got my own little apartment a few streets away. Nobody should bother you there." I was speechless for a minute for a minute. I couldn't find my voice to utter a simple 'yes'. Edward laughed at my sudden voice loss.

His voice was rough as he said, "Maybe I should drive, seeing as you can't move or speak." I nodded and rushed out into the rain, diving for the passenger's seat. I got in and saw Edward had already started the engine, and as soon as I latched the seat belt on, he sped away.

It took less than ten minutes for us to get there, and I spent most of the journey looking – or rather, staring – at Edwards profile, fantasizing about running my lips over his string jaw.

Not really fantasizing, coz when we got to the apartment – small and cosy, the way Edward always like things – I got to kiss his jaw and many other parts of his body. Let's just say that we both ended up on his big bed - what is up with guys and big beds??? – Both half-undressed and breathless. He pushed me away when I tried to go further – naughty me – muttering,

"Mmm, Bella. Not now. Later, I promise." I groaned in frustration and rolled off the bed, heading for the bathroom to have a long warm shower. I heard Edward busying himself round the small place, and I smiled to myself. Maybe things won't be as bad as I thought.

I wrapped a long towel around me and stepped out of the shower, dried my hair and threw on a pair of jeans and a black turtleneck. I stepped out of the bathroom, and threw my dirty, wet clothes in a bin liner. I was going to throw them away, get rid of any evidence that this day and the other ever existed.

I felt much more relaxed and at ease as I stuffed the bin liner in my bag and walked to the kitchen. Edward was standing at the small table, a newspaper in his hand, reading the top headline that was printed across the top.

**MASS MURDER STRIKES SMALL TOWN OF WASHINGTON, FORKS.**

I gasped and Edward started reading the top line quickly under his breath.

"Due to the capacity of two years ago, the murder strike in Seattle, Forks had been under protection by secret services. After everything had quietened down, the secret services thought it was a waste of time protecting a small town that was so small that no one would ever bother going there. Murder strikes in this small town called Forks, today.

"Police Chief Swan is on the case, he answered our questions respectfully, but when it came to the suspect murder all he said was: 'I am sorry, but that is Police Department papers. We are not allowed to release information without the permission of the suspect, or the suspects' lawyer' (**A/N: I don't know if this is true, but I saw it on Law and Order before so I decided to use it.**)

"The small town of Forks is yelling to us, 'is it right that the Secret Services should protect a town so big, where murder is a daily pacing? Is it right to abandon such a small town, defenceless and calm, to sort it's self out?' so, dear readers, I believe that the answer is no. no, a defenceless town must not be left alone, to face its own problems. Every town MUST have help. And will our town, Seattle, help Forks fight its way through to righteousness?" Edward stopped, and collapsed in a chair, sighing. He dropped his head in his hands and muttered,

"No, no this can't be happening again."

"What? What _is _happening, Edward? Say something." I pleaded. I had been relieved about hearing that my father was fine, that he was still alive. But when Edward had said 'no, this can't be happening again' I was confused and forgot about everything else.

I knelt by his side and stroked his hair.

"Bella, you do remember Victoria, don't you?" he asked.

"Yes."

"When I said we were leaving . . . Victoria had . . ._ threatened _Carlisle, that if we left without a warning, something might happen to the citizens of Forks, or . . . something might happen to _you. _So Carlisle went and told as many people as he could about everybody leaving, about a job he couldn't turn down. And I told you, thinking that maybe if I told you, you'd tell other people. But that wasn't what Victoria meant. She meant that we warned _her _so she's out to get you. And every other person who knows you and has loved you." He finished and raised his head to look at me. I was stock still, listening to every word he said.

"C-Charlie?" I stammered. Edward looked away and I jumped to my feet, grabbing a jacket, money and car keys.

"Bella, what are you doing?" he asked, surprised.

"I'm going to find my father." I said my voice shook with unshed emotion. He stood up and walked over to me, his arms wide. I fell in them and he hugged me tight to his chest.

"Bella, everything is going to be OK. You can't go; your father thinks you're dead. He's done a funeral and everything. I . . . was there." I gasped and started to cry. He rocked me gently side to side, "But I'll come with you if it helps." He whispered

"Oh, Edward! Thank you, so much!" he stroked my hair until I had calmed down.

"OK. Let me get a change of clothes, money and jacket, yeah? Meet me down there. I'll be down in a minute." I nodded and flew – literally – down the five flights of stairs to the bottom. I jogged to my car and waited patiently for Edward to come down.

When he did, it wasn't only he that walked down the road towards me.

But Jason Blackfire walked towards me in the opposite direction.

It was crossfire.


	11. Chapter 11

**Thx every1 4 ur reviews! I luv reading wot u have to say – I always write that, don't I? I hope you enjoy this chapter and don't forget to review!**

**CHAPTER 11.**

Ever felt like the world was crashing down around you? I did. That's how I felt when I saw Edwards and Jason's eyes lock.

Daggers shot from each side, and a growl escaped Edwards's throat as Jason reached me first and slung an arm round my shoulders. I shrugged him off and stepped aside, glaring at him. Jason didn't seem to notice the lack of affectionate response I gave him.

Jason stepped forward as Edward leaned casually on my car, tracing patterns on the roof. I was half-scared he was going to leave dents in it, he wasn't covering up his anger as well as he was trying to.

"Surprise, surprise. What have we got here?" Edward dropped his black gym bag on the floor and stepped in front of me. Jason chuckled.

"She doesn't want to go with you, Unwanted. She loves me." Edward growled menacingly at the words.

"Does this matter concern you? It's her choice." Jason looked at me and gave me a smouldering look.

"Bella, baby, don't make me choose between Kayla and you. What's the point? You are always going to be the one I choose."

"Jason, _you _gave me a choice. Between you and a life in hell, or Edward with a life, I can be happy in. I'm sorry, but I made the choice for you, Jez. Go back to Kayla, I bet she's expecting you." I sneered.

"With the damage you left on her face? No thank you." He chuckled.

"You are disgusting." Edward frowned. I put a hand on Edwards's chest, keeping him in place. After he said the three words, I felt him shudder in a way that suggested he wanted to attack.

"Edward, please." I pleaded. Jason laughed and came closer to me, one hand tracing the line from my nose to my lips.

Edward growled and I slapped Jason's hand away. As much as I might hate him, I didn't want his blood on my hands.

"Go home, Jason." I said, my voice shaking.

"Er, how about no?" it was getting dark, and I could see Edwards's eyes shining. The anger made him shake just slightly, "Bella, babe, what you saw today was a great misunderstanding. I would never go behind your back with _Kayla._"

"Jason, go home. What's done is done. You can't go back."

"If you don't come home, I'll make you." He hissed through gritted teeth. I flinched just slightly, and Edward went ballistic. He slammed into Jason, throwing him against the wall of the apartments. Jason 'humphed' as the air left his body and collapsed to the floor. Edward proceeded to kick and punch him wherever he could reach. I yelled at Edward to stop and tugged on his shirt, pulling at his arms and dragging him away.

"EDWARD DON'T! STOP IT!" he finally turned round to listen to me, and I enveloped him in a hug. He dragged me away, leaving Jason bleeding on the floor. We human/vampires have blood in our body and it's so . . . precious to spill. Sometimes people like us die if we spill too much blood, even if it's a little bit as if you cut the palm of your hand and blood rushes out. But that little bit could be fatal.

"Edward, we have to help him. We can't let him die!" I reasoned. Edward sighed and looked away, wiping his hands repeatedly on his jeans. The blood was gone but he wouldn't stop. I grabbed them in my own and rubbed my thumbs against the back of his.

"Edward, please. Do it for me." he sighed and he _still _wouldn't look at me. and I understood what he feared.

"Edward, you think I'm going to go back to him? Is that why you're leaving him to die?" I laughed. Edward nodded and stole a glance my way.

"Do you really think I'll go back to him after what he did? Edward, I chose _you_, OK? And I will never change my mind on that!" he looked at me then. I mean, really looked at me, as if he was trying to understand what I was trying to tell him.

_What if she runs to him first chance she gets? You can't trust her, not now. Not yet._

I dropped his hands and took a step back, hurt filling my face.

"You don't trust me?" I whispered. Edward realised his mistake and tried to repair it.

"No. no, that's no what I meant. what I meant was, I can't trust you for loving only me. I'm scared how easy and close I am to losing you again." I stepped close to him and grabbed his face with my hands, making him look at me.

"I will never trade you or your love for anything or anyone on the world."

"Bella, don't listen to him! He doesn't love you as much as I do!" Jason croaked. He was on hi knees now, and I saw that he had stopped bleeding.

I grabbed Edwards hand and we got in the car and drove away, leaving Jason Blackfire and his lies, behind.


	12. Chapter 12

**CHAPTER 12.**

We drove in silence for a couple of miles, Edward kept his eyes on the road and I looked at him, expecting him to scold me for being so egocentric.

I mean, I had gotten what I wanted out of him, and then we left Jason alone on the floor in the street. That sounded selfish to me.

I shivered as the cold came through the open window on Edwards's side. He looked at me and pressed the up button. The window went up noiselessly; I wrapped my jacket tighter round me and shuffled down in my seat, curling my legs under me and resting my forehead against the window. I closed my eyes momentarily and heard Edward stop the car and put something warm over me. From the feel of it, it was his expensive leather jacket.

I smiled to myself and went to sleep, knowing that we had a whole night ahead of us with the short amount of gas my car already had.

There was a beeping sound from my pocket and I groaned, sitting up and taking it out of my pocket. I glance at the mobile screen and turned it off. I wasn't going to let Jason harass me with consistent phone calls and texts. Edward looked at me and the crooked smile that made me fall in love with him, appeared in his handsome face.

I peeked at him from my under my jacket collar and he laughed.

"You're not going to tell me off?" I asked, suspicious about what he was thinking. I was too tired to go into his mind, and it took me a lot of energy just to say those words.

"Tell you off? For what?" he asked.

"For being egocentric." I muttered so low I hoped he hadn't heard. But he had.

"Why would you be egocentric? Bella, you haven't done anything to be conceited, you know." He chuckled.

"Yeah, I did. I got what I wanted from you and I left Jez on his own in a street. That is selfish if you ask me."

"But I'm not, am I?" he smiled at me. I had this horrible feeling I wanted to stick my tongue out at him, but that seemed childish, and according to my human years, I should be about twenty. I grimaced, _am I that old? Urgh, thank God I'm not human. I would be worrying about my age all the fricking time! _I couldn't go back to sleep after that. I was wide-awake, talking to Edward about everything and anything that would pop into my mind.

At around 10.00pm, Edward stopped the car in front of what looked like a little Bed and Breakfast. He looked at it for a minute and then over to me.

"You're tired, Bella." He noted.

"No, I'm not." I protested. Just then, a great yawn escaped. Edward laughed and pulled me onto his lap. He pulled his seat back so there was enough room for him and me.

"Of course you aren't" he replied sarcastically.

"Yeah, but I don't want to go in."

"Why not?"

"Because I would want you in the same bed as me, and then I would kiss you and that might lead to something that you don't want me to do."

"Hence I would do something I don't want to do." He murmured in my hair. He started to hum the lullaby I had 'grown up' with. The first few nights that Edward used to stay at my house, he stayed all night with me, sending me to sleep by humming the lullaby he had written especially for me. He stroked my hair as he hummed me to sleep.

The last thing I remembered was Edward lying me down in my seat, and stroking my hair a last time before ending the lullaby.

**Sorry if this chapter is so short but I have looooooooooooots of HW!! If I don't catch up, I'll have detention for a year!!**

**Don't forget to review!**


	13. Chapter 13

**soz if i haven't upd8d! i had exams and hw . . . so, this is chapter 13! hope you like it and don't 4gt 2 review!!!**

**CHAPTER 13.**

I woke up and stretched. My bones creaked and Edward laughed. He wasn't driving, just lying on his seat. I sat up and rubbed my eyes, narrowing my eyes and trying to look out.

It was impossible to see. The huge downpour closed off the whole place.

Home.

"Oh my God, we're here." I whispered. Everything looked the same. The houses, the street, the cold, the _rain. _

"We're here." He sighed, brushing a lock of hair from my face.

"Oh no." I muttered, suddenly remembering something.

"What?"

"Bella Italia."

"Excuse me?" he asked, his eyebrows pulling into a frown.

"It's the place I work for and I was supposed to start tonight at five! What am I going to do? I need that job more than I need blood!" I hissed, rummaging in my pocket and pulling out a tattered leaflet with a number scribbled on it. I sighed as I started dialling the number, hoping the man wouldn't fire me for missing my first day. Edwards hand rested lightly on mine, but strong enough to prevent me from pressing the 'dial' button.

"Sorted. I already called in when you were sleeping and they said it was fine if you couldn't make it today. They hope your father is OK." I gaped at him in awe. What made this man love me? He was so perfect and careful that it was hard to imagine if you told someone he was with a girl who was a total cow and had hated his guts for a measured length of time. I looked away from his eyes and opened the door, to be welcomed to a draught of air that made me shut the door again. Edward laughed and turned the heating on.

Now that we were here, I had no idea what to do. Should ijust barge through the door, calling for my father? I would kill him that way. He hasn't seen me in two years! He reckons me DEAD! Maybe I could just pretend to not know him, but know what might happen to him if he stayed here any longer.

Maybe we should pretend top be FBI agents and tell everyone to evacuate the town.

"Bella, you don't look like an FBI agent. You look too young. And your father _will _have a coronary if he sees you now." Edward murmured. He was looking out of the window to the forest where he had abandoned me all those years before. I knew he didn't forgive himself for what he did and I don't know if I forgave him totally for what he did. I still remember the cold grass under my face as I willed my self to die. I still remembered the horrible pain in my torso as he turned and left, the breaking of my heart, the sound of it shattering to the ground. I could still remember Jason's arms around me as he helped me to my feet, and took me away. the memories of those blinding nights and screaming days. The pain ripping through my body, the fire running through my veins.

"How do you know what I was thinking? And ideas do _you _propose? We can't just go crashing in!" I folded my arms over my chest, typical huffy body language. Edward scoots over so he was sitting close to me and wrapped an arm round my anger- quivering shoulders.

"I know what you were thinking because you let your guard down. You are a vampire, now, Bella. Not human. Maybe we shouldn't go see him at all, but just run round guarding and making sure no one is hurt." He whispered, running a hand through my hair.

"That's easy for _you _to say. You see your family everyday and whenever you need them they're a whisper away. I haven't seen my father in _two years._ No letters, no phone calls, no e-mails . . . and you expect me to sit around whilst a crazy vampire is murdering? Yeah right!" I huffed and jumped out of the car, casually leaning on the door.

"bella, I am NOT trying to keep you away from your family, OK? I am merely trying to keep you safe! Get in the car and we'll talk things over. We need to sort out a place to say where they won't know us and we have to think a plan over if you don't want your father dead!" he hissed throughb the half open window. I was about to shake my head when I saw the look in his topaz eyes. It was a mixture between anger, sadness and confusion.

Since I had met the wonderful Edward Cullen, topaz had becom my favourite – if not only – colour and gem.

I looked at Edward carefully before stepping in the car and shutting the door quickly behind me. Edward leaned back and pinched the bridge of his nose. He did this when he was stressed or was _being _stressed. I immediately felt guilty for acting like such a stuck up bitch. He was right. I coulkdn't just wander in the house and expect him to believe I was his long lost daughter. He was right. We needed to think a plan over.

"So, what are you thinking?" I asked, wrapping my cold arms – I _am _still half human! – around his hard waist and planting a kiss on his cheek. He melted and loked at me, sadness flickered momentarily in his topaz eyes. I can't stop SAYING it! Topaz, topaz, topaz, topaz, topaz . . .

"Mmm, I was thinking of staying in the Red Lion hotel, in Port Angeles." (**A/N: I have no idea if the hotel exists, but I types 'hotels in Port Angeles, washington' in google and it came up with a whole list, so I picked out the one that sounded more interesting. Anyway, don't forget to REVIEW!**)

"isn't that, like, really expensive?" I asked, snuggling closer to him. He looked down at me like I was nuts and laughed.

"Bella, believe it or not, I still _do _have that money I saved over the centuries!" he kissed the tip of my nose lightly and laughed again, his warm voice – like warm honey - filled the car.

"Sorr-_ee_! After all, I HAVE lived two years with a bunch of vampires that work their butts off to bring a few dollars home!" Edward went suddenly still at the mention of my 'family'

"Oh, sorry." He put a finger to my lips and drew me to his chest.

I suddenly knew.

We were not alone.

A shadow swept past the car window and the darkness in the sky thickened to almost black.

**soz if it's short but i luv a gd cliffie!**


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